Cardiogirl 19 percent body fat 100 percent fun

2007-08-11

how do they do it?

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Alright, as you probably know, all of us at Cardiogirl Manor have been swapping and trading colds. I have been as diligent as ever about washing my hands, not touching my face, swabbing with hand sanitizer, sacrificing Kleenex to the Cold and Flu gods and I cannot catch a break. I have a cold. This is wrong on so many levels I don't even know where to begin. So I will focus on the main offense: it's summer and the mercury is routinely hitting 90 degrees. Need I say more? Who catches a cold in summer?

I have given this some thought and I have noticed that the doctors I run with (yes, that's right, mine is a bustling and prominent social circle) never seem to have a cold. Granted, I don't see them daily, or weekly, or really even monthly, but when I do see them they're not sick. Okay, really I'm talking about six people here: our pediatrician, my doctor, my kid's asthma doctor, my husband's doctor, the gynecologist and the endocrinologist.

I've analyzed their technique of handwashing with soap and water and with hand sanitizer. None of them seem to do anything magical. They all seem to take their time working in betwixt the fingers and the backs of their hands as well as the palms. I do the same.

They don't scrub the way I've seen surgeons scrub (on the Discovery Health Channel) before an operation. There's no sink with a foot pedal and they don't use a brush to scrub under their nails and along their elbows. And yet these six doctors never seem to get sick. Not once have I walked into the exam room to find them sneeze, sniffle or stifle a cough. I have never had an appointment re-scheduled due to the doctor's illness.

They seem to have some type of invisible Cone of Protection that keeps them healthy -- I guess they must be the Sovereign Six. It's like that cartoon the Justice League (I think that's what it was called) with the various super heros. Look above! Here comes Gyno Doc! He can stop an infection dead in its tracks with just the glint of his speculum. Germs beware.

Now there is one doctor I see who, after he washes his hands, twirls around counter-clockwise two times, hops on his left leg once and then clasps his hands together very quickly. Maybe that's the piece I'm missing.

Clearly, I jest. He does all of the above, except for clasping his hands at the end.

So this is my plea: if anyone has any insider knowledge on why doctors can rebuke germs at all costs please, please send me a clue. I don't think many people read this, so your secret will be safe with me.

One last note -- I'm not above any OCD rituals, either.

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2007-08-11 at 9:25 a.m.

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